مشاهد من الطفولة: .... ابتسم وأنا استرجع مشاهد من طفولتي والتي غالباً ما كانت شقاوة صبيانية... لم أكن كأي طفلة عادية تستمتع باللعب بالدمى وتمثيل دور ربه البيت والأم!!
كانت متعتي في لعب الكرة والرياضة وفي الاستكشاف والمغامرة!!! أتذكر جيداً لعبي مع أولاد الحارة وأتذكر شقاوتي التي تنتهي بالذهاب للمستشفى بسبب إصاباتي المتكررة.
أتذكر خيالي الجامح وربما سذاجتي الطفولية... كنت أحيا فيها وأنا أحلم بالطيران!!! كنت أفكر وأحلم: لماذا لا نطير مثل الطيور؟؟!! ... كنت أتأمل كثيراً في النجوم ليلاًً وأتخيل بعقل طفله: هل هناك ناس يعيشون خارج الأرض على الكواكب الأخرى وحتى على النجوم وفوق السحااااااااب!!!!؟؟؟؟
أتذكر خيالي الجامح وربما سذاجتي الطفولية... كنت أحيا فيها وأنا أحلم بالطيران!!! كنت أفكر وأحلم: لماذا لا نطير مثل الطيور؟؟!! ... كنت أتأمل كثيراً في النجوم ليلاًً وأتخيل بعقل طفله: هل هناك ناس يعيشون خارج الأرض على الكواكب الأخرى وحتى على النجوم وفوق السحااااااااب!!!!؟؟؟؟
كنت متأثرة بما أراه من كتب وما أشاهده من مسلسلات كرتونية!!! أتذكر كتاب قصصي أدخلني بقوة لهذا العالم الذي أحبه... قصته بدأت مع فتاة حملتها البالونات فوق السحاب لترى عوالم أخرى وتكتشف وجود مخلوقات تعيش فوق السحاب...
لا أنسى أبدا ذاك الكتاب والصور التي فيه!! ألهمتني جداً لأصعد على سلم وأحاول الطيران أو أحاول استشعار الوجود في الهواء بحرية وانطلاقه!! أتذكر أني أصبت ونزفت وذهبت المستشفى... والدي كان يغضب مني ومن هذه الشقاوة... يظنها شقاوة ولكني كنا أراها متعة وخيال وعالم جميل وااااااااسع لا حدود له!!
كذلك كنت أتمتع بالمغامرات وعمل دوريات إستكشافية في الحارة... نجوب الحارة طولاً وعرضاً ونحاول رصد الأماكن الجديدة والتي تثير الفضول والتكهنات!!!
كبرنا وبدأ هذا الخيال الخصب يقل وبدأنا ندخل عالم الكبار والواقعية والالتزام والانضباط و...و...!!
لكن ما أتذكره جيداً في طفولتي هو ميلي للصبيانية ولعل السبب كان وجودي وسط ذكوري كبير ... كان أمامي إخواني الأولاد ... لذا كنت أحب تجربة لبس الدشداشة وتعلم لبس العمامة "المصر"... لدرجة أن برعت فيها أكثر من إخواني أنفسهم بشهادة والدي الذي شاهدني مرة أضعها بإتقان أمام المرآة وقد لبست دشداشة أخي... فقال كلمة أثرت بي بشدة وقتها: (يا ليتك كنتي ولد!!!) ... لا يعلم والدي مدى أثر الكلمة فيني وقتها لدرجة كنت أدعو ربي قبل نومي أن أتحول إلى ولد في الصباح... !!!
كذلك كنت أتمتع بالمغامرات وعمل دوريات إستكشافية في الحارة... نجوب الحارة طولاً وعرضاً ونحاول رصد الأماكن الجديدة والتي تثير الفضول والتكهنات!!!
كبرنا وبدأ هذا الخيال الخصب يقل وبدأنا ندخل عالم الكبار والواقعية والالتزام والانضباط و...و...!!
لكن ما أتذكره جيداً في طفولتي هو ميلي للصبيانية ولعل السبب كان وجودي وسط ذكوري كبير ... كان أمامي إخواني الأولاد ... لذا كنت أحب تجربة لبس الدشداشة وتعلم لبس العمامة "المصر"... لدرجة أن برعت فيها أكثر من إخواني أنفسهم بشهادة والدي الذي شاهدني مرة أضعها بإتقان أمام المرآة وقد لبست دشداشة أخي... فقال كلمة أثرت بي بشدة وقتها: (يا ليتك كنتي ولد!!!) ... لا يعلم والدي مدى أثر الكلمة فيني وقتها لدرجة كنت أدعو ربي قبل نومي أن أتحول إلى ولد في الصباح... !!!
كبرت ولكني عشت مشتته ما بين عقل رجل وقلب امرأة... الرجل غالباً ما يعيش بعقله فقط والمرأة غالبا ما تنساق وراء عاطفتها ومشاعرها وأحاسيسها!!
بداخلي... كنت دائماً أذم المرأة وأعتبرها حمقاء ساذجة لتنجر وراء عاطفتها ومشاعرها اتجاه الرجل الذي لا يقدر ولا يحترم المرأة وعاطفتها... مهما كانت مخلصة صادقة نبيلة متفانية فلن تجد التقدير والاحترام من هذا الرجل الجاحد المتغطرس... تعلمت الصرامة والجدية والواقعية وقياس الأمور بعقلانية ... كنت أفرض حظر على قلب المرأة فيني فلم أكن أسمح لها بالظهور... كنت أعارض طبيعتي وأناضل بشدة لأفرض وأعيش بعقلانية رجل ولا أسمح لمشاعر أنثى أن تداخلني... نجحت لمدة طويلة جداً ولكن بالنهاية أدركت أني كنت أخادع نفسي وأني مهما فعلت لم أقدر على استئصال هذه الطبيعة الأنثوية مني.
أصبت بضيق وإحباط أني أبقى امرأة بمشاعر وأحاسيس وعاطفة أقوى منها... رجعت أدركت أن بداخلي نبض وكيان أخر كنت أهمشه وأهمله... لكنه عاد للخفقان بقوة بداخلي فجأة وبلا مقدمات... فغلبتني مشاعر المرأة وعاطفتها وسعيت أن أحكمها بمنطق وعقلانية لكن بدون فائدة!!
أصبت بضيق وإحباط أني أبقى امرأة بمشاعر وأحاسيس وعاطفة أقوى منها... رجعت أدركت أن بداخلي نبض وكيان أخر كنت أهمشه وأهمله... لكنه عاد للخفقان بقوة بداخلي فجأة وبلا مقدمات... فغلبتني مشاعر المرأة وعاطفتها وسعيت أن أحكمها بمنطق وعقلانية لكن بدون فائدة!!
اكتملت لدي الصورة الطبيعية وزادها حدة ووضوح قرأتي لكتاب (الرجال من المريخ والنساء من الزهرة للكاتب جون جري) في نسخته العربية... أحدث هذا الكتاب تحول هائل في نظرتي لطبيعة كل منا... أدركت أن المرأة أقوى بعاطفتها ومشاعرها وأن الرجل يبقى رجل بتفكيره المنطقي العقلاني... هناك توازن وحكمة من ربنا الحكيم العليم لنكون مكمل لبعضنا البعض... فلا المرأة أضعف ولا الرجل أقوى... كلاهما قوي بما لدية من طبيعة مناسبة له ... ولا يقدر أن يستغني عن الطرف الأخر.
كل هذا كان قناعة وفلسفة وفكر ومبدأ وتحليل جيد أراحني وأمدني بقوة
لأقول للمرأة بكل صدق وصراحة: آسفة لاستهانتي بقوتك وروعتك وكمالك في عاطفتك العظيمة...
وساعدني لأقول للرجل: ربما قوي أنت بعقلك ومنطقك ولكنك لا تساوي شيئا بدون ضميرك وقلب المرأة الذي يحتويك.
أدركت الآن أني أخطأت بحق كل صديقة لجأت لي لما تعرضت للغدر والخيانة... كنت قاسية معهن بذم النبل والإخلاص والصدق الذي يحملنه بداخلهن... كنت أتصور بغباء أن القوة في تحكيم العقل فقط وأن العاطفة لا تجر إلا المصائب... لكن العاطفة النابعة من قلب صادق هي التي تلين وتذيب كل ضائقة وعقبة... فلولا الصدق والإخلاص والمشاعر النبيلة لما بقي البعض أوفياء متمسكين بالطرف الأخر مهما جرى معه....
تخيل أيها العقلاني لو أنك تزوجت فتاة بلا مشاعر نبيلة ومحبه صادقة... فقط بشروط تفرضها وهي تقبلتها... ثم –لا سمح الله- صرت عاجز لا تقدر على شيء... أليس من حقها بحكم عقلانيتك ومنطقك أن تترك وترى حياتها بعيد عنك؟؟!!
تخيلي معي أيتها العاطفية لو انك تزوجتي رجل بلا ضمير ولا يقدرك ولا يحترم محبتك وإخلاصك... لو انك قصرتي في حقه ولو بمقدار ذرة ...ألن يذمك ويهينك؟؟ ألن يفكر بالزواج عليك أو حتى طلاقك؟؟!!
نصيحة للمرأة: أخيتي... جميل ما تحملي من مشاعر ولكن لا تدعيها تذهب لمن لا يستحقها... امنحيها لمن يقدرها ويدرك قيمتها ويُعظم مكانتها... وبالطريقة الصحيحة المشروعة!
نصيحة للرجل: اتقي الله وحكم ضميرك... لا تظلم وتستهين بالمرأة التي قد تمنحك صدق محبتها ونبل مشاعرها وعميق إخلاصها... فهي اختارتك وحدك لحسن ظنها بك وتقديرها لأخلاقك واحترامها لشخصك... فلا تذم ذوق وعاطفة المرأة فهي اختارتك قبل كل شيء.
*=*=*=*=*=*=*
بالنهاية أنصح الجميع بتحكيم الضمير وتقوى الله في السر والعلن... لست هنا أذم عقل الرجل ولا أمدح قلب المرأة... الطرفين نجدهم درجات متفاوتة... قد نجد رجل بعقل راجح وضمير حي... وقد نجد فتاة بمشاعر قوية ولكن رؤية فاسدة... فلا تعرف أين توجه مشاعرها وقد تقع في أمور لا تحمد عقباها...
التوازن مطلوب والوسطية هي الحل...
كل واحد مسئول عن تصرفاته وحركاته وما ينطق به لسانه.... وكل واحد يتحمل تبعات أعماله....
((نسأل الله التوفيق والسداد والرشاد والستر في الدنيا والآخرة))
دمتــــــم بــود
التوازن مطلوب والوسطية هي الحل...
كل واحد مسئول عن تصرفاته وحركاته وما ينطق به لسانه.... وكل واحد يتحمل تبعات أعماله....
((نسأل الله التوفيق والسداد والرشاد والستر في الدنيا والآخرة))
دمتــــــم بــود
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